2003-02-10 - 10:55 p.m.

scariest ride home ever today.

i was on my way home from dropping off a coworker at his house off of westhiemer. this white suv was pacing me, so i looked over and there was this woman looking at me while she licked her exposed breasts.

she paced me for about a mile before i did what any self respecting guy would do, scream "crazy hooker" run a red light and speed away.

i honestly do not know how she expects to pick up any tricks doing that. it's a little hard to be aroused by some skank licking her breasts when you are too afraid of getting knifed by a crazy prostitute.

later that night i got stuck in line at wal-mart behind a man buying a basket full of wrangler clothing and a box of trojan magnum condoms.

i was holding a purse and buying abba's greatest hits and some bobby pins.

polar opposites of masculinity.

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