2001-12-27 - 3:22 a.m.

so i had an intersting conversation online tonight, almost made me want to take my profile off of the awful makeoutclub.

if you get bored reading it scroll down to the read any good books lately thats when i was like "what the fuck" but i played along anyway because what in the hell else is there to do at three a.m? basically this girl is fucking gross as all hell.

snarfpox: heyas

jigmonster: yo yo

jigmonster: who dis?

snarfpox: whats up b?

snarfpox: your lovs

snarfpox: lova

jigmonster: me loves?

jigmonster: blimey

snarfpox: indeed

snarfpox: nice attempt at being british

jigmonster: it was great wasnt it?

snarfpox: not rally

snarfpox: *really

jigmonster: aw

snarfpox: i was trying to humour you

jigmonster: this is ***** right?

jigmonster: or is it?

snarfpox: no

snarfpox: i saw your pic on moc...

snarfpox: it didnt break my monitor

jigmonster: oh so i dont know you

snarfpox: so i thought id say hi

snarfpox: actually

jigmonster: ha

snarfpox: you mocked the people on it..

snarfpox: so you dont suck too much

jigmonster: really?? yeah those people are lame

snarfpox: yeah

jigmonster: hey lets get a super cool picture of me with a guitar

snarfpox: those people suck

snarfpox: indeed

snarfpox: i like the artsy ones

snarfpox: or psuedo artsy ones

jigmonster: eh i dont know what i am

jigmonster: you you livin in da h-town?

snarfpox: uh huh b

jigmonster: that sucks

snarfpox: the pics i mean

snarfpox: they are funny

snarfpox: why?

jigmonster: eh no reason i dont really care i'm just making conversation

snarfpox: yo yo yo

snarfpox: i miss the h-town b

snarfpox: i go to schoolio in denton

jigmonster: ew man i hear dallas sucks

jigmonster: i think i have an aunt or two that live in dallas

snarfpox: i try to avoid it

snarfpox: im so great

snarfpox: people come to my room to entertain me

jigmonster: wow you must be the most popular girl in school

jigmonster: no one comes in here to entertain me

jigmonster: actually it would be kind of creepy if they did

snarfpox: i am

snarfpox: drunk men

snarfpox: they want me

snarfpox: ..

jigmonster: ah

snarfpox: what can i say?

jigmonster: i dont know

jigmonster: isnt school out now?

snarfpox: yeah

jigmonster: that rocks

snarfpox: this was a week and a half ago

snarfpox: i used their drunkeness against them

jigmonster: ah

snarfpox: it was the highlight of my week

snarfpox: i made them do handstands

snarfpox: while i took tasteful black and white pics

jigmonster: sounds like an uneventfull week

jigmonster: yeah tasteful is the only way to go

snarfpox: nooo

snarfpox: it was grreeat

snarfpox: i told them i screwed my brother

snarfpox: so they wouldnt touch me

snarfpox: it worked

jigmonster: haha

jigmonster: thats great

snarfpox: i know

snarfpox: i used to use the whole..

snarfpox: im a lesbian thing..

jigmonster: yeah if i said that i would think it would work too

snarfpox: but then some men like that...

snarfpox: soo

snarfpox: it backfires

jigmonster: yeah the gay thing backfires too sometimes

snarfpox: oh

snarfpox: yes

snarfpox: gay men

snarfpox: noting gets me wetter

jigmonster: thats why i take you get a good friend of the opposite sex to be your fake boyfriend/girlfriend

jigmonster: haha

jigmonster: wait -i take

jigmonster: but then sometimes they dont really care

snarfpox: i almost pulled that with some guy at the gas station

snarfpox: but he might ask to watch

snarfpox: so i opted to run away

jigmonster: good choice

snarfpox: yeah

snarfpox: he asked if i was available

snarfpox: immediately i thought

snarfpox: like for parties?

jigmonster: yeah being propositioned isnt that great

snarfpox: indeed

jigmonster: man so far this conversation is going great not a single a/s/l in sight

snarfpox: now that we've established that///

snarfpox: moving on....

snarfpox: yeah

snarfpox: im wonderful....

snarfpox: that crap is soo trite

jigmonster: yeah its pretty awful

snarfpox: indeed

snarfpox: sooo

snarfpox: read any good books lately?

jigmonster: eh a few

snarfpox: such as?

snarfpox: how to make love to a woman?

snarfpox: cause ive so read it

jigmonster: no the joy of sex or tantric extacy

jigmonster: i cant decide which one is better

snarfpox: make love to a woman....

snarfpox: they use the word gigolo

jigmonster: wow it sounds awesome, a must read

snarfpox: plus it talks about painting your body in your woman's menstrual flow like a tribal warrior

snarfpox: and have wild crazy sex with her

snarfpox: *having

jigmonster: sounds fun you should try it

snarfpox: nooo

snarfpox: not to into that

snarfpox: the clots

snarfpox: dont stick very well

snarfpox: *too

jigmonster: yeah too messy for me

snarfpox: indeed

jigmonster: its all fun during but after you have this big mess to clean up

snarfpox: indeed

snarfpox: much like with virgins too

jigmonster: yeah

jigmonster: girls are just plain messy they drip stuff everywhere

snarfpox: yeah

snarfpox: girls are dumb

snarfpox: and too bloody

jigmonster: is there anything you guy do that doesnt cause you to start bleeding?

snarfpox: you guy?

snarfpox: what?

snarfpox: titty fucking

jigmonster: well you guys = girls in general

jigmonster: oh yeah forgot about that one

jigmonster: are you always this lewd?

snarfpox: usually

snarfpox: i havent called you cunt rag yet

snarfpox: but oopsie daisy

snarfpox: out it comes

jigmonster: wow not yet hold on let me scroll up

jigmonster: nope

snarfpox: its my favourite cuss word

jigmonster: yeah i like to use my hair to mop up cunts

snarfpox: nice

snarfpox: so thats why it looks so gross?

snarfpox: i was wondering..

snarfpox: with the whole brushing of the teeth..

jigmonster: yeah explains alot doesnt it?

snarfpox: if any of that energy was ever directed to the hair..

jigmonster: actually i started to wash it recently

jigmonster: i found out that my hair was actually brown after that

snarfpox: nice nice

snarfpox: ill add that to my girlish fantasies

jigmonster: shampoo works wonders, who'd a thought?

snarfpox: indeed

jigmonster: you info is rad

jigmonster: its so cool its invisible

snarfpox: indeed

snarfpox: i left it at college....

snarfpox: you know how it goes..

jigmonster: i'm suprised i went that long without checking it

snarfpox: like your mom's intact hymen

jigmonster: i live dangerouly i guess

jigmonster: it's still intact?

snarfpox: no

snarfpox: it was intact.....

snarfpox: but alas with the pressures of college..

snarfpox: it was lost thee

snarfpox: *there

jigmonster: my mom never made it to college

snarfpox: cool

snarfpox: my mom is a jail bird

snarfpox: wanna mock me for it?

jigmonster: nah

snarfpox: cool

jigmonster: i need to get me one of them mail order brides

snarfpox: from russia?

snarfpox: you can pay and go over to some bride mart

snarfpox: and meet them there...

jigmonster: or just find someone who is about to get deported and marry them

snarfpox: they are like aerobics instructors..

snarfpox: mmm

snarfpox: i need someone to pay for my grad school

snarfpox: whats your rus

snarfpox: h

jigmonster: no rush

jigmonster: i dont ever plan to get married

snarfpox: nice

jigmonster: i get bored with people too easily

jigmonster: plus i dont like suvs and minivans and i'd rather kill myself than have a kid

snarfpox: nice

snarfpox: i love babies

snarfpox: and husbands

snarfpox: and blow jobs..

jigmonster: i know i am the world's best person

snarfpox: ill make a great wide

snarfpox: *wife

jigmonster: thats great

snarfpox: indeed

jigmonster: maybe they'll give you the worlds best wife award

snarfpox: maybe so

snarfpox: or a centerfold in razzle

jigmonster: liking blow jobs will help

snarfpox: who knows

jigmonster: razzle those things that are half candy half gum?

snarfpox: no

snarfpox: the brit pron mag

snarfpox: *porn

jigmonster: ah

jigmonster: everyone should be in a prn mag atleast once

snarfpox: yeah

snarfpox: i mean totally

snarfpox: well

snarfpox: hopefully not you

jigmonster: yeah probally not me

jigmonster: since i look like a cyclops and all

snarfpox: i mean you are no phreakyphry

jigmonster: plus i have webbed hands and a forked tounge

snarfpox: the reason why i might not ever be able to have sex

jigmonster: i have no idea what a phreakyphry is

snarfpox: its some guy on MOC

snarfpox: his profile could be the greatest promotion for abstinence

jigmonster: you visit moc frequently?

snarfpox: only when im bored...

snarfpox: such as tonight

jigmonster: yeah he's a black belt so dont mess with him

snarfpox: ghetto freak nerd

jigmonster: yeah no ghetto freaks having sex with me please

snarfpox: yeah

snarfpox: or hopefully horse drawers

jigmonster: his pic seems artsy you should totally give him a blowjob

snarfpox: artsy?

snarfpox: nooooo

snarfpox: and the artsy ones merely amused me

snarfpox: as in to mock them

jigmonster: come on the kool-aid man?

snarfpox: true true

snarfpox: ill let you tea bag him

jigmonster: and the way he looks at the camera...brilliant

snarfpox: while i watch and pleasure myself

jigmonster: you know it

snarfpox: but this is as far as a sexual encounter will go

jigmonster: wait nah

snarfpox: fine fine fine

jigmonster: what? wait i missed something

jigmonster: whatevah

snarfpox: ok lovah

jigmonster: besides isnt everyone online morbidly obesce?

snarfpox: oh of course

snarfpox: nice spelling btw

snarfpox: really charming

jigmonster: yeah i noticed

jigmonster: i got the spelling bee award in the third grade but it all went downhill from there

snarfpox: of course

jigmonster: got into some drugs and prostitution

snarfpox: indeed

snarfpox: the downfall of every great man

jigmonster: my spelling was never quite the same

jigmonster: well as fun as this is i think i am going to stop talking to you now

snarfpox: lovely

snarfpox: tata

jigmonster: lata

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