2001-10-20 - 2:04 a.m.

got off the phone with julie, suppossed to hang out tomarrow.

everytime we are together it is in her life. we hang out with her friends do their stuff etc...

i know that i'm the one doing it, i'm the one who doesnt let her see my life i just feed her one sided stories and hope that that is good enough because basically i dont think i am ready to share it. besides i'm happy being the passenger.

oh yeah, told my mother about her today, kind of popped up by mistake when they asked me where i have been for the past three days. even though i only stayed at her house for one of them i guess they didnt notice my car parked out front or something.

its funny actually how i nonchalantly bring up major changes in my life several months after they occur.

i waited three months to tell them where i work now and didnt even tell them that i lost my old job until they asked three months later what i was working on and i told them "i dont work there anymore". there is actually a long list of reasons why i do this but to sum it up its basically easier to not tell them.

i have not seen my father in three weeks i should really make an effort because i owe him money.

thats all on the family front, i tried to spend quality time with my brother under the guise of "workin' out" but it didnt work out.

families are exhausting

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